Lou Dobbs' ego seeks to stay on at CNN...

Although Lou Dobbs will be leaving CNN after being released from his contract, his ego is requesting permission to be kept on at CNN so that up-and-coming actors turned opinion journalists can learn from the very best. But because Mr. Dobbs has allowed his ego to run unfettered at CNN for so many years, this might not prove a workable option.

Interestingly enough, though, just after announcing his departure from CNN, and his ego's request to remain, Mr. Dobbs mouth has now asked for a release from its contract to speak for Mr. Dobbs; however, Mr. Dobbs' mouthpiece denied his mouth's request, saying Mr. Dobbs will do what he can to put a sock in it.

Then, when asked what he might be considering as a post-CNN career, Mr. Dobbs' mouth wrote a large check that his ego just couldn't cash, so at this point it's not clear what the future holds for Mr. Dobbs, for his ego, for his mouth, or for this hyper-extended metaphor.

But until Mr. Dobbs' ego allows him to pull his head from his a$$, his mouth will be unavailable for comment.