You're fired.
Sincerely,
52 million-plus happy Americans
P.S. Sean, Ann, Bill, Rush, and Laura... it sucks to be you.
Get over it. We could do it... twice... so can you.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Please VOTE!
No Voting = No Sniveling!!!
Besides, voting will make you feel good so you won't want to snivel.
Monday, November 3, 2008
And... there are no words...
...for this sort of insanity, either.
Yes... they're completely free to believe what they believe and to say anything about their beliefs, but I'm completely free to believe they're both completely nuts.
Yes... they're completely free to believe what they believe and to say anything about their beliefs, but I'm completely free to believe they're both completely nuts.
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Barack the Dad...
Barack Obama spent part of Halloween attending a party with his family. When he felt photographers were getting a bit too close to them, he asked them to back off.
John McCain, who doesn't let anything slide, will probably find in this episode something about which he can shrilly caw through the next 24-hour news cycle, such as telling the press what a good friend to them he is and that he'd never say such a thing as "back off" to anyone.
Meanwhile, Governor Palin will doubtless be fed some inane tagline from her handlers that she can repeat ad nauseam, which will make some insipid connection between trick-or-treat and tax-or-terrorize, or something equally illogical.
But both of them should instead just shut up and respect who they're seeing: Barack the Dad.
No Voting = No Sniveling
John McCain, who doesn't let anything slide, will probably find in this episode something about which he can shrilly caw through the next 24-hour news cycle, such as telling the press what a good friend to them he is and that he'd never say such a thing as "back off" to anyone.
Meanwhile, Governor Palin will doubtless be fed some inane tagline from her handlers that she can repeat ad nauseam, which will make some insipid connection between trick-or-treat and tax-or-terrorize, or something equally illogical.
But both of them should instead just shut up and respect who they're seeing: Barack the Dad.
No Voting = No Sniveling
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
I love to vote...
I voted today. I've been voting since the 1972 Presidential Election. It always makes me feel good. I love to vote.
You have that sensation that everything is good and special in the world, that the universal balance is just perfect, that there's no anxiety about your decision because you can't know the election results: just the happy, altruistic sensation of having done something positive.
Millions of people around the world wish they could vote. So do I. But I sure hope Mickey Mouse, Goofy Dog, and Yosemite Sam don't vote this year. That would piss me off. These guys never vote the same way I do.
No Voting = No Sniveling
You have that sensation that everything is good and special in the world, that the universal balance is just perfect, that there's no anxiety about your decision because you can't know the election results: just the happy, altruistic sensation of having done something positive.
Millions of people around the world wish they could vote. So do I. But I sure hope Mickey Mouse, Goofy Dog, and Yosemite Sam don't vote this year. That would piss me off. These guys never vote the same way I do.
No Voting = No Sniveling
It's official!
The Socialist Party of America's 2008 presidential nominee, Brian Moore, said on The Colbert Report tonight that Barack Obama is definitely not a socialist, anything but.
Whew. I'm glad that's over.
Now, if we can just get Rosy the Plumber to say Joe the Plumber is not a plumber. Imagine that. Sweet vindication!
No Voting = No Sniveling
Whew. I'm glad that's over.
Now, if we can just get Rosy the Plumber to say Joe the Plumber is not a plumber. Imagine that. Sweet vindication!
No Voting = No Sniveling
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
OMG ED...
Are your eyes fatigued from keeping them glued to TV's campaign coverage?
Does your mouse finger ache from scrolling through the political blogs?
Are you up to your ears with Keith's pronouncements?
Do you want to projectile vomit at the sound of Sean's voice?
Have you stopped laughing when Rush speaks... about anything?
Do you feel bad for Ann since she can't support/vote for Hilary?
Are you just plain sick of Sarah's wardrobe malfunctions?
John's pander fests?
Barack's redistributisms?
Joe's malaprops?
Well, Mr. Joe Sixpack, you just might suffer from E.D... that's right...
...Electile Dysfunction!
The only cure for E.D. is to vote!
No Voting = No Sniveling
Does your mouse finger ache from scrolling through the political blogs?
Are you up to your ears with Keith's pronouncements?
Do you want to projectile vomit at the sound of Sean's voice?
Have you stopped laughing when Rush speaks... about anything?
Do you feel bad for Ann since she can't support/vote for Hilary?
Are you just plain sick of Sarah's wardrobe malfunctions?
John's pander fests?
Barack's redistributisms?
Joe's malaprops?
Well, Mr. Joe Sixpack, you just might suffer from E.D... that's right...
...Electile Dysfunction!
The only cure for E.D. is to vote!
No Voting = No Sniveling
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Sparty On!
Great game today!
State looked good and and UNM didn't.
I loved every minute of it, but Bob Ufer is on spin cycle (may he rest in peace).
Sparty hearty and sing along!
State looked good and and UNM didn't.
I loved every minute of it, but Bob Ufer is on spin cycle (may he rest in peace).
Sparty hearty and sing along!
Hockey Mom haikus, part deux...
Wasilla's new rink
sounded like a good idea
but it's still going.
Saks Fifth Avenue
and Neiman Marcus make her
look good but not John.
sounded like a good idea
but it's still going.
Saks Fifth Avenue
and Neiman Marcus make her
look good but not John.
Uncomfortable stuff...
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!
At times, I just couldn't believe my ears.
I'm officially and entirely on the side of, "happy, excited, exuberant, and motivated."
"Uncomfortable stuff," indeed.
At times, I just couldn't believe my ears.
I'm officially and entirely on the side of, "happy, excited, exuberant, and motivated."
"Uncomfortable stuff," indeed.
"A lie big enough..."
On NPR's Weekend Edition, this morning, a man from Colorado said,"If McCain loses this election, we're headed into Communism. Is that plain enough?"
Sadly, yes; it is plain enough. It's plain to see that John and Sarah (et al.) have repeated the "Obama is a Socialist" lie often enough that some people, such as yourself, now believe it.
Wow. Great work, John and Sarah.
But why stop there, you two? There's still time to roll out something like, "Obama is a space alien from an Islamic planet intent on taking over Earth, whose resulting Communist government will tax the rich and redistribute that money so everyone who wants one will be able to get Canadian-style health care and an abortion from Satan at the commune's clinic?"
Too bad, though. You really missed your chance. Oh well.
Look, I defend this Colorado man's right to his opinion, to anyone's right to theirs, but how did he arrive at it?
For one possible answer, please consider the following quote: “If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it. The truth is the mortal enemy of the lie, and thus by extension, the truth is the greatest enemy of the State.” -Joseph Goebbels
Sadly, yes; it is plain enough. It's plain to see that John and Sarah (et al.) have repeated the "Obama is a Socialist" lie often enough that some people, such as yourself, now believe it.
Wow. Great work, John and Sarah.
But why stop there, you two? There's still time to roll out something like, "Obama is a space alien from an Islamic planet intent on taking over Earth, whose resulting Communist government will tax the rich and redistribute that money so everyone who wants one will be able to get Canadian-style health care and an abortion from Satan at the commune's clinic?"
Too bad, though. You really missed your chance. Oh well.
Look, I defend this Colorado man's right to his opinion, to anyone's right to theirs, but how did he arrive at it?
For one possible answer, please consider the following quote: “If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it. The truth is the mortal enemy of the lie, and thus by extension, the truth is the greatest enemy of the State.” -Joseph Goebbels
Friday, October 24, 2008
R.I.P. Journalism...
I just heard Sean Hannity say tonight on Hannity and Combs that "journalism died in 2008."
According to the sage Mr. Hannity, this happened because the media (Sean-speak for the liberal media) is in the tank for Barack Obama and won't investigate his connection to Bill Ayers, even though Fox News investigated this very connection, spent a prime-time hour of their own air presenting its fair and balanced case, and still no one cares.
Why? because... wait for it... no one cares!
If journalism died, it did so a long time ago: at the precise moment Sean Hannity got a job as one. We can only hope if journalism does die, it's his extremist, invective-filled form of it.
And from whose tank is he pointing his pen-filled finger, anyway? Keep talking, Sean: with every utterance, you help fund the Obama war chest.
According to the sage Mr. Hannity, this happened because the media (Sean-speak for the liberal media) is in the tank for Barack Obama and won't investigate his connection to Bill Ayers, even though Fox News investigated this very connection, spent a prime-time hour of their own air presenting its fair and balanced case, and still no one cares.
Why? because... wait for it... no one cares!
If journalism died, it did so a long time ago: at the precise moment Sean Hannity got a job as one. We can only hope if journalism does die, it's his extremist, invective-filled form of it.
And from whose tank is he pointing his pen-filled finger, anyway? Keep talking, Sean: with every utterance, you help fund the Obama war chest.
Heavy is the crown...
New York City's Mayor, Michael Bloomberg, has just managed to steal a possible third term.
Perhaps instead he should have just done something more subtle, like this, so his constituents, NYC's voters, wouldn't have to feel so bad about getting bent over so blatantly by the Bloomster.
But I guess it's for their own good... right?
Perhaps instead he should have just done something more subtle, like this, so his constituents, NYC's voters, wouldn't have to feel so bad about getting bent over so blatantly by the Bloomster.
But I guess it's for their own good... right?
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Wearing thin...
"If we swipe enough free sh*t,
we just might pay for this fiasco."
- Roy McAvoy, "Tin Cup"
According to the Census Bureau, median earnings for women in 2007 were $35,102.
Meanwhile, the McCain Campaign, champions of the little guy and gal, just put Country First and spent approximately $150,000 to outfit Governor Sarah Palin in clothes from three of the most fashionable and expensive stores in the world. My hunch is that few if any of the small towns of which the governor is so fond of speaking can boast of a single Saks, Neiman Marcus, or Bloomingdales.
The amount spent on her clothing is what a little more than four American women --- a hockey mom, a Wal-Mart mom, a small-town mom, and Josephine the Plumber --- would earn in a year, working full time.
A disconnect?
Ya think?
Maybe it's this simple: maybe someone in the McCain Campaign is feeling guilty about hoodwinking the governor into joining this tacky ticket by trying to make the whole ordeal worth her while, trying to compensate her for her time keeping their fiasco afloat.
we just might pay for this fiasco."
- Roy McAvoy, "Tin Cup"
According to the Census Bureau, median earnings for women in 2007 were $35,102.
Meanwhile, the McCain Campaign, champions of the little guy and gal, just put Country First and spent approximately $150,000 to outfit Governor Sarah Palin in clothes from three of the most fashionable and expensive stores in the world. My hunch is that few if any of the small towns of which the governor is so fond of speaking can boast of a single Saks, Neiman Marcus, or Bloomingdales.
The amount spent on her clothing is what a little more than four American women --- a hockey mom, a Wal-Mart mom, a small-town mom, and Josephine the Plumber --- would earn in a year, working full time.
A disconnect?
Ya think?
Maybe it's this simple: maybe someone in the McCain Campaign is feeling guilty about hoodwinking the governor into joining this tacky ticket by trying to make the whole ordeal worth her while, trying to compensate her for her time keeping their fiasco afloat.
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