Hey Democrats! Repeat after me...

I'd like to make a suggestion to all you Democrats as you lead up to the presidential election: for the next 13 days, just say "no comment" to every question you're asked. This suggestion applies to all you Democrats whose off-the-cuff commentary might have some effect on the electorate in their district and their state.

For example...

• When you're asked, Senator Schumer, what you think Obama's chances are, just smile and say "no comment."
• When you're asked, Senator Biden, if you think the Obama administration might be tested by an international crisis after it enters office, just smile and say "no comment."
• When you're asked a question, Senator Kerry, that might cause you to attempt to make a joke about someone or something (i.e., to show just exactly how inept your sense of humor truly is), just smile and say "no comment."
• When you're asked, Senator Frank, about the possibility of some new area of taxation, just smile and say "no comment."
• When you're asked, Congressman Murtha, if your district might have been comprised of racists and rednecks, just smile and say "no comment."
• And if any one of you is asked what color the sky is or how bat-sh*t crazy Ann Coulter is or what a complete thug Sean Hannity is or what state Washington D.C. is in or who's buried in Elvis's freaking grave... JUST SMILE AND SAY "NO COMMENT!"

Look, in order to pull this off, all you have to do is believe that anything you might have to say is nowhere near as important as this election, because guess what guys? IT ISN'T!!

The additional years of misery we'll all have to endure will in no way be compensated for by the fleeting satisfaction you'll enjoy from saying something only you think is important or clever or funny or witty or insightful.

Just remember... the conventional wisdom suggests that upon finding yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging, but the corollary to this is as follows: upon finding yourself not in a hole, the last thing to do is start digging.

So put those shovels away, guys.

We all enjoy, and should vigorously defend, our first amendment right to free speech, but for the next 13 days, just shut the hell up! PLEASE!